Movie Review – Furious 7

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Furious 7 (2015)
Written by Chris Morgan
Directed by James Wan

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In the wake of the events of Fast & Furious 6, the crew is being hunted by Deckard Shaw, the brother of the previous villain. Deckard starts his reign of terror in Tokyo, taking responsibility for the death of Han back in Tokyo Drift. Hobbs is next on the list, and he survives, warning Dominic Toretto to protect his people. A covert ops team with the U.S. government offers to help Dom track down Shaw if he aids them in obtaining a computer program called God’s Eye. Created by a hacker Ramsey, the program will use all digital devices on the planet to find whomever you want. Ramsey has been abducted by a mercenary named Moses Jakande who wants to know where she has stashed the God’s Eye. So pretty much your standard simple action movie.

This is my favorite of the Fast & Furious films so far because it did the one thing I desperately needed from the franchise: stop taking itself seriously and just be insane. Character development is eschewed in favor of just one continuous action set piece. And it couldn’t be better. There’s Hobbs and Deckard throwing each other through plate glass windows. Cars driving backward out of cargo planes to parachute on to remote mountain roads. A car flying out windows and hopping through skyscrapers in the Middle East. There is an ambulance being used to take down a military drone. The ridiculousness of Furious 7 makes it the perfect step in the evolution of this franchise.

The acting is still utterly stupid on Vin Diesel and Paul Walker’s parts. They just are horrible actors and Diesel is marble-mouthing his way through the film. It was definitely sad that Walker died during filming and the movie does an adequate send-off. I just wish the fiction of the series had developed the relationship between Dom and Brian beyond just the former’s mumbling of the word “familuh.” Mia is worthless again and also sets up a horrible future for Letty. It seems if you start having babies you no longer to be part of the crew going on adventures. You stay home. With the revelation that Letty and Dom are married she better be worried about having her days be numbered.

It was announced a little while ago that a spin off film was coming that featured Hobbs and Deckard and that is the movie I am looking forward to. These two ridiculous idiots were the best part of Furious 7. Hobbs is just basically a meta human and Deckard is a Cockney Bond villain. I applaud the filmmakers that they just took the safety off and let these two characters be entirely insane.

The action set pieces are so over the top that I felt engaged for most of the film. With these movies breaking the two-hour mark consistently now, I always find my attention waning. But this one hooked me the most. The Hobbs/Deckard fight was an excellent way to kick things off, the airplane and mountain sequence was great, the Abu Dhabi heist was fun, and the grand finale on the streets of Los Angeles was made great by one primary element. I like to refer to it as Deus ex Rock-ina, when Hobbs flexes his fucking arm cast off, shows up in a commandeered hospital, uses it to crush a military drone by driving off an overpass, then wield the drone’s railgun by hand to take down an attack helicopter. Vin Diesel does get some hilariously crazy moments, particularly the slow motion jump into a wrench fight with Jason Statham.

This is still a terrible film. But it is a terrible movie that knows it is terrible and doesn’t try to have any sort of thematic weight. The heaviest the movie gets is the Paul Walker tribute at the end. Otherwise, the pretense of this having a story is gone. It is just a loud, dumb way to spend a movie studio budget.


Predictions for the next film:
I know some things about Fate from the trailer. Charlize Theron is a car hacker? She blackmails Vin Diesel. All I care about is Hobbs and Deckard being back and stealing the movie from Vin Diesel.

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